my own piece of mind

Saturday, September 03, 2005

morninG(-____-)

went for a morning exercise and back le.. humph took the chance to clear my thoughts also.. humph..

dad.. how had yer been? saw u in my dreams yest nite, *ermm wasn't a very nice dream!* anyway saw u together with us.. humph how had yer been? wad are u doing now? everything still going well? remember to take care of yer health..! ha! maybe u won't even see wad i typed here..! coz u dun even know how to use a com.. but anyway will always rem the things u told me.. gotto take gd care of mum.. yup yup.. humph kinda guilty for tt.. had been doing my NS now n seems like i kinda lost touch with wad's happening at home.. .... hiaz... do i want my dad to return to this family? humph i hope he hadn't left in the first place.. but since he left i dunno how will he return.. the embarassment he will face, the pressure he will face.. come to think about it i rather he keep in contact with us n not return ba.. and also the adaption mum n us will need to make when he returns .. humph maybe the pic now is wad our family's most comfortable with now n wouldn't want to have any more changes into it.. but whether or not dad returns isn't up to me to decide anyway.. just let it be ba.. dun think so much le.. ... but anyway miss yer dad..!

humph look through the e-mails that i send to u & ur replies.. humph.. all the promises we made all the lill stuff we said to each other all the pet names tt we call each other by.. n the sweet things u did.. i really miss u.. i really miss u alot.. hiaz tho life moves on, there will always be this lill corner in my heart which keeps ur smiles, ur love, ur everything and ur name.. how will the both of us turn out years down the road? i have no idea and i dun wanna be bothered by it.. i just wanna do wad i need to do now.. am i escaping from it? nope.. maybe i just want my secure zone for now.. but none the less i really hope tt some days later we could still keep in contact.. there is no forgiveness needed in this breakup & there isn't a need for apologies.. y? ..... dunno..... maybe i just dun wanna hear it.. coz sorry doesn't mend back a broken heart and when there is no sorries wad is there to forgive? ... humph life just gotta carry on..!
gRacE jia you for ur life k.. guess you will be busy preparing the dance for x'mas rally and also towards the end of this yr u will be having ur exams also.. jia you study hard, will pray tt u could have all the concentration u need.. muz score good grades k.. anyway am glad tt u had put down the tuition something which ties up more of ur time.. work still as busy like b4? humph gotta take good care of yer health k.. will rem to keep yer in my prayers.. jiayou..

alright kinda late in the morning le.. n guess wad.. 'lush' 99.5 ROX..! but my stomach grumbling louder than it..! hee'he.. =D oki anyway just now when i was running was thinking about some stuff.. humph.. i could be training myself to be a better person in facing the real challenges of tml but success doesn't comes by thinking and talking it has to achieved through my hands!! yes my hands..! and how many times have i to remind myself that i gotto be hardworking with my hands if i wanna achieve my dreams..!! argh.! BAKA raymond!!stop daydreaming & get to WORK!!

oki.. scolded myself n i feel very guilty now.. wahaha..! kinda idiotic there.. but anyway some ways to improve n motivate myself also.. hee'he.. oki.. gonna startdoing my work le.. ermm.. but stomach still rumbling..! ermm.. a hungry man is a angry man..! how could i get work done?! ... excuses..!! but anyway will try to do some work first..! ...................................... GRrrrrrrOaarrrr..............................GRrrrGRr..........................

Here I Am @ 9/03/2005 08:48:00 AM